


Dope

by toastyspongecake



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Abuse, Angst, Drug Addiction, Drug Use, F/M, Physical Abuse, Self-Harm, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-24
Updated: 2017-06-24
Packaged: 2018-11-18 06:24:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11285514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toastyspongecake/pseuds/toastyspongecake
Summary: Three years after the Bone Eaters' Well closed off, Kagome is a Super Pop Star in Japan, struggling to find happiness with her progressing drug addiction. When her walls come crashing down, she finds herself running off to the one place where she finds comfort- the Bone Eaters' Well- when suddenly, it opens. "A world without you, InuYasha. This is what it has done to me."MY REPOST from ff.net





	1. This is who I am now.

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so this story is going to have a lot of triggers. Drug use/addiction, physical abuse, and self-harm. Please be aware!

I'm high.

High on my makeup. High on my long black nails. High on my gold bedazzled Versace bodysuit and white knee-highs. High on the crowd screaming my name. And another, drug-induced high.

All I feel is ecstasy.

As I sit in my dressing room looking at myself in the mirror, I know I'm not the same girl I was three years ago. I am no longer the girl who cares about others more than herself. No longer the girl who has fun at school and has lots of friends. No longer the girl who turns down dates from boys because she's too modest. And no longer the girl who jumps through a well and into feudal Japan, saving the world at the side of a half-demon. That girl doesn't exist anymore. The girl staring back at me has dull, bloodshot eyes, smeared with black makeup and glazed over with sadness and regret. Her once curved lips fall down into a pathetic grimace, and her once full body is now fragile and emaciated.

But still, the ecstasy of the high bubbles into my brain and a small smile creeps onto my lips. "I am happy…" I try to convince myself and I pull the band around my upper arm tighter with my teeth, grabbing the syringe and filling it again with my happiness, placing it against the inside of my arm.

"Excuse me, Miss Higurashi, but you're on in three minutes." The shy stage worker stands at my door, looking down at his feet as to not intrude upon my private escapades.

I sigh and place the needle down. "I guess this will have to wait." Untying the band around my arm, I toss it on top of the syringe and stand slowly, making my way toward the door. "Don't act like you didn't see what I was doing. It's no secret to anybody." My voice curdles in my throat.

"Please, I'm sorry, Miss Higurashi." He places a finger to the microphone set on his head. "Two minutes, Miss Higurashi."

"Lock this door behind you, would you honey? I don't want anybody stealing my stash." I saunter past him and make my way down the long corridor to the stage door. My body feels numb and my brain buzzes as the cheering of the crowd grows louder and louder.

Behind the stage door are dozens of stage crew members, my costume coordinators, my hair and makeup artist Nori, and my manager Katashi. Nori approaches me first, touching up my face and chest, and layering my hair with a few heavy doses of hairspray. "You look amazing, as always, thanks to my talented handy work." She smiles genuinely at me. "But you're beautiful even without the costume makeup, Kagome."

All I can muster in response is a weak smile. Nori's happiness quickly fades and she gathers her things and steps aside. I move over to where a handful of stage workers are waiting to get me situated securely onto a rising platform, the platform that would soon lift me into the sights of the thousands of screaming fans above me. Their cheers ring in my ears now and my brain bubbles again, causing a grin to flash upon my face. "30 seconds!" I hear somebody call from afar.

Katashi approaches me now, and the bubbles quickly subside. He grasps my jaw gently in one of his hands and turns my face to look at him. I can hear Nori protesting in the defense of my makeup. His eyes bare into mine and a devious smirk appears across his strong face. Looking at him makes me feel lovingly protected, yet sick to my stomach.

He gives a small pat against my cheek. "You will be wonderful, as always, Hachiko."

 _Hachiko._ Faithful dog. That became his nickname for me about six months after he found me. He said it was because I was always at his beck and call, like a dog loyal to its master. Back then, he promised me happiness, and I guess I was a dog who wanted to be happy.

"I know." I respond without a sliver of emotion in my voice.

He hand travels down my face and neck, across my shoulder, and down onto my arm, where he harshly grasps the indentation that the band left on my skin. I wince mentally, but to his disappointment, show no physical reaction. His face retracts into a scowl and he opens his mouth as if to contest.

"10 seconds!"

Katashi drops his hand and turns away to take his place beside Nori.

"9…"

I turn to look at them both. Nori is wearing her always radiant smile, gesturing to me a small thumbs up.

"8…"

Katashi has both hands in his pockets, glaring at me with hard eyes.

"7…"

I coyly bite my bottom lip. He always likes it when I bite my lip. It's a sign to him that I want him. A sign that I'm ready to submit to him.

"6…"

And even when I don't want him, I bite my lip, because that's what faithful dogs do to keep their masters happy.

"5…"

Katashi's scowl retreats and a scheming smirk takes its place. A sign he's planning to have his way with me later.

"4…"

I redirect my attention to the screaming crowd.

"3…"

The bubbles in my brain return.

"2…"

The platform begins its ascension, lifting me up through the stage and into the eyes of my adoring audience. The screams grow louder. The flashes of light are bright and colorful. My heart is pounding. And as those first bass lines resonate in my ears...

"1…"

Ecstasy.

 _This_ is who I am now.


	2. Heaven

Tonight was the last night of my tour, and we were celebrating. Katashi had arranged for a party in one of the ballrooms at _Imperial Tokyo_ , one of Tokyo's finest five-star hotels. It was elaborate, and completely overdone, but expected. I sat at the end of a long table, surrounded by all of my stage crew, costume coordinators, set designers, everybody who was involved in making this tour happen. There are even some people here that I don't know. Nori sat beside me, a cheesy smile plastered across her face, as always. On the other side of me is Katashi, with a tentative hand placed on my thigh. Everybody is drinking and talking, passing around bottles of expensive champagne, refilling their glasses again and again. I make a mental note to take one of the bottles for myself later.

"Ahem." Katashi clears his throat and stands, stepping up onto one of the chairs. "I'd like to propose a toast." The room quickly quiets down and everyone's attention is directed towards him.

"In honor of the completion of Kagome Higurashi's first ever sold out tour." Everybody in the room claps and cheers. Katashi turns to face me, gesturing his glass to me. "Kagome, you have changed the lives of not only the people in this room, but of the people of Japan. You are an incredible singer, a brilliant songwriter, a beautiful person, and we love you. This is to you, Kagome."

Cheers fill the room, glasses around the table are raised high, then everybody drinks. I smile at them all gratefully, despite the fact that Katashi's speech was completely farfetched. Katashi finishes his drink, turns and begins to make another announcement. "I would also like to announce that as Kagome's manager, Kagome and I have come to the decision to begin production on a second album…"

The room cheers. Katashi continues, "And based on Kagome's astounding success as a musical artist, we have decided to take her career to the next level. At the start of next year, we will be announcing Kagome's first ever _WORLD_ tour." The cheers emanating from the room are louder this time. "Now I think now is a good time for me to stop blabbering so we can get the real party started." Katashi finishes his speech and jumps off of the chair on back onto the ground. Music fills the room and some people move to the dance floor, drinks in hand. The noise level in the room rises dramatically and I can hear Nori screaming at me over the music.

"A world tour, Kagome? That's amazing! I'm so happy for you!" She takes my hand in hers and gives it a loving squeeze.

"Thank you, Nori. I'm really looking forward to it." I respond, faking excitement.

I can feel Katashi nearing me, and I turn to face him. He sits down in the the chair beside me, pulling it close to mine. His hand lays on my thigh and I can feel my body tense up under his touch. His fingers slowly massage my thigh as he leans in next to my ear.

"I've been thinking about you all evening, pet." He whispers seductively into my ear. His breath smells of whiskey, his drink of choice, which he keeps in a gold flask stuck in his jacket pocket.

"What have you been thinking about me?" I ask him, looking down at his hand on my thigh.

"I've been thinking about those lips. You know how it drives me crazy when you bite your bottom lip…" Instinctively, I draw my bottom lip up in between my teeth. Katashi notices this, because his grip on my thigh tightens.

"Ah, so you like to tease. Two can play at that game, my little Hachiko." Katashi's hand slides slowly up my thigh. His fingers near the place in between my legs that he has familiarized himself with over the past three years. A sacred place that I once wanted to save for the person I love, yet so easily gave up to him.

His fingertips come in contact with that place and I grasp my glass in my hand and lift it to my lips, downing the entirety of my drink at once. I'm not drunk enough for this.

Katashi pulls his hand away and grabs the closest bottle that he can see. Champagne bubbles spill onto the table as he pours me another glass, filling it too close to the brim. I watch them fizz up and trickle down the sides of the delicate tall stemmed glass, like raindrops racing down car windows, or tears staining pale cheeks. Watching them, I'm suddenly reminded that I haven't cried today.

"Drink up, my dear. We'll be having fun soon." Katashi whispers into my ear and kisses my cheek lightly, then stands and walks away, leaving me alone with only my champagne and my guilt.

Quickly, I down two more glasses of champagne. My head is beginning to feel fuzzy, but my mind is starting to let go. I make my way over to where Katashi is standing, surrounded by people prying him for answers about next year's tour. I approach him from behind, slithering my arms around his waist. He startles, turning towards me, but relaxes when he realizes who I am.

He places his hands on my hips. "How are you feeling now, Kagome?"

"I feel like I want you." I slide my hands up his chest, tracing the definition of every muscle with my fingertips.

He laughs quietly and pulls my hips against his. His growing erection presses into my thigh and I slide one of my hands down to massage him gently on the outside of his pants.

Leaning down, he hisses into my ear. "You're making it very hard for me to keep from ripping your clothes off right here…"

A shiver runs through my entire body and I can feel myself getting wet. Suddenly, my whole body begins to ache for his touch.

"Please, tell me you already have a room for us." My eyes plead him.

Reaching into his pocket, he pulls out a familiar key card. "The penthouse."

I lean in close and nibble softly on his earlobe. "Take me there...now."

We're all over each other as soon as the doors to the elevator close. Katashi pins me against the wall, kissing my face, lips, and neck hard. He rips open the front of my shirt, and to his surprise, reveals that I'm not wearing a bra.

"Naughty girl…" He growls low in his throat.

He picks me up and I wrap my legs tight around his waist. We arrive at the top floor, and the elevator doors can't open fast enough. With me latched around his waist, he carries me to our room, kissing me hard and exploring my mouth with his tongue. When we reach the room, he presses my back against the door and frantically searches his pockets for the key card. My tongue teases him, tracing his ears, jawline, and neck, placing sporadic kisses across his face.

Finally, he finds the key card and unlocks the door, throwing the door open. He has me on the bed before the door even has time to close. His fingers fumble with the buttons on my pants for a minute, then he rips my pants and panties off all together, tossing them into the floor.

Immediately, his face dives into my pussy. He traces around my clit with the tip of his tongue, causing me to drench myself in my own juices. When his tongue flicks against my clit, my hips buck underneath him and I let out a well sustained moan. He switches between small hard flicks and long slow strokes of his tongue, pausing every so often to take a breath before diving right back in.

"Oh baby...you're gonna make me come…" In response, Katashi begins to make small circles with his tongue around my clit, sucking lightly.

My moans grow louder and the movements of his tongue are getting faster and faster. Flicking, stroking, sucking. My body is on edge, trembling in pleasure.

Suddenly, Katashi reaches up with his hand and plunges two fingers deep inside of me, and it's enough to send me over the edge. I scream out in complete ecstasy, riding my orgasm as his tongue works my clit and his fingers plunge in and out of my dripping pussy. As my orgasm subsides, he pulls his fingers from my body and examines my juices.

"Taste how wonderful you are, pet." Katashi forcefully sticks his fingers in my mouth, allowing me to taste myself. He pulls back and moves over me, his face hovering inches from mine.

"Delicious." I reply, licking my lips.

"Now that I've gotten you all wet, I can finally do to you what I've been waiting for all evening. Turn over." I turn over onto my stomach and Katashi grabs my hips, pulling my backside up so that I'm on my knees. I feel him position himself behind me and he gives my ass a quick slap.

Then he slides himself into me, and takes me to heaven.


	3. A World Without You

I lay there on the bed, face up, watching the blades of the ceiling fan circle around and around again. The cool air erects my bare nipples, and I'm reminded that I need to put on some clothes. Lazily, I roll off the bed and begin to search the room for my clothes. My bra and panties are conveniently placed on the floor at my feet, and my pants are strewn across the dresser in front of the bed. My shirt, however, is nowhere to be found. I sigh and slip on my panties, then my pants, and finally hook my bra into place around my small breasts.

Katashi is in the shower. He always takes a shower after having sex with me. I never ask him why, mostly because I don't really care, but also because I usually take advantage of the time I have to myself while he's in the shower. The alone time that I can get is precious, and it's time I can use to get high and try to forget this hell that I'm living.

I was too preoccupied when I initially entered the room to notice that Katashi had already had our bags and belongings brought up. They were all neatly placed on the floor in front of the closet. I walk over to them and find my small overnight bag, in which I always carry a few changes of clothes, essential makeup products, bathroom necessities, and of course my only source of happiness. Frantically, I dig through the bag. I know my time is limited and that Katashi will be out soon. My mind flashes back to before the show, when his hand harshly gripped the spot where I tie off my arm. He never liked it when I used.

Finally, I find what I'm looking for. I pull out a small black zippered case and rush over to the makeup vanity, sitting down on the low stool in front of it. With ease, my fingers zip open the case and lay it open flat on the tabletop. On one side there are two clean syringes, strapped securely in place. On the other side is a pocket, which contains a spoon, a lighter, a thick band, and multiple packets of pure heroin. I have rehearsed this process hundreds of times before, and like muscle-memory, my body takes control. My hands swiftly fish out the contents of the pocket and lay them out in front of me, then takes out one of the clean syringes, removing the guard that protects the needle. With no time to waste, I open one of the bags and pour out a small portion of the perfect, white powder into the center of the spoon. I hold the lighter underneath the spoon, light it, and let the heat of the flame dissolve the powder into the liquid that will soon be swimming through my veins. Gently, I take the syringe and place the needle in the liquid, pull up on the syringe, and watch it fill to the brim.

And now it's time. Quickly, I tie the band around my arm, pulling it tight with my teeth. I lay my arm flat on the table, and expertly, I dive the needle into the skin located at the inside of my elbow. With little pressure, I push the liquid into my body. I sigh in relief and loll my head back, a smile on my face as I feel my body beginning its descent into ecstasy.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Katashi's voice bellows in anger from across the room. I snap my head up and see him standing in the doorway of the bathroom, his hair dripping onto the carpet and a towel wrapped around his waist.

I stammer. "I, uh…"

"You stupid bitch!" He flounces over to me and grabs my zipper case, throwing it hard against the front door. "How many times have I told you to quit that shit?"

"It's not that easy, Katashi! I-"

"You what? You _need_ it? The only thing you need is me, bitch." He grabs me by the arm, pulling me up out of the stool to face him. His voice low and maniacal, he hisses at me. "I warned you what would happen if I caught you doing this again."

Katashi throws me against the vanity with such force that my head collides with the mirror, shattering it into a thousand pieces that fall scattered to the floor. I can already feel the blood rushing down my face. My body falls to the ground and the palms of my hands press into the pieces of the shattered mirror as I attempt to push myself back up. Katashi approaches me again, hovering over me.

"You're nothing without me. You are a worthless piece of shit, and without me, you would be _nothing_." He spits at me. All I can muster are small whimpers.

"Get up!" Sloppily, I stand to my feet, obeying his command.

There is an immediate blow to my stomach. My breath leaves my body and I fall hard to my knees, clutching my midsection with my hands. The pain is unreal, and I struggle to find my breath again. Katashi grabs my hair and suddenly pulls my head back so that I'm facing him. I see him kneel down beside me.

"I'm going to beat the addiction right out of you. After this, you're never going to pick up another drug again." My eyes dart to the side and I notice now that he's working at his belt, pulling it from the loops of his pants. He's going to beat me like an animal.

He stands and collects the belt in his hands. He folds it, however; he grasps it so that the buckle side is outward.

"Please, Katashi! Please don't!" I plead with him, tears streaming down my face. But he doesn't listen.

They always say that the first lash is the worst, but they're wrong. Each lash of the belt tears into my skin even more than the last, causing increasing agony to overwhelm my body. The buckle rips into my arms, legs, and stomach with such force that I can feel bruises developing the second the buckle breaks contact. He repeatedly lashes my body with the belt, hitting the same spots over and over, creating magnificent welts, bruises, and gashes all over my body. I can feel the blood beginning to trickle down my arms and stomach. I know I'm screaming, pleading, begging him to stop. But Katashi continues to wail on me with all of his strength.

"You stupid, stupid, stupid bitch!" Each word accented with a lash to my stomach.

My ears are ringing from the sound of the belt and my own screams. The pain is agonizing and I feel myself becoming light-headed. I look around for a way out, but there is none. The belt keeps coming. The pain has paralyzed my body. _'I'm going to die tonight.'_ The thought keeps rushing through my head, and InuYasha's face appears in my mind. _'I'm sorry, InuYasha.'_

But then, my mind takes over. _'No, Kagome. Fight back. Like you always did.'_

I try to lift myself up, but the wails of the belt push me back into the floor. My body instinctively curls into a ball begins to accept its defeat.

But my mind takes over again, screaming at my body. _'InuYasha would want you to fight back and live! Live for InuYasha!''_

My eyes snap open and I kick my legs against Katashi's shins with as much strength as I can possibly conjure. His legs buckle underneath him and I can hear one of his shins snap. He yells out in pain and falls to the ground hard on his side, cradling his broken leg.

Faster than I could ever possibly imagine, I scramble to my feet and make a run for the door. I notice my black zipper case lying at the foot of the door from when Katashi threw it, and I grab it as I run out. As fast as my legs can carry me, I run down the long hallway, clutching my zipper case to my chest. I can hear Katashi's distant voice yelling after me from the room. "I don't need you, bitch! I hope you die on the fucking streets! You're nothing to me! You hear that? _Nothing!_ "

My legs keep on pushing. Down all fifteen flights of stairs. Through the hotel lobby. Into the streets. I keep running, ignoring the strange and concerned looks from strangers. Ignoring the cold wind against my bare chest and stomach. Ignoring the throbbing pain of the bruises and gashes across my pale, shriveled body. I keep running until I can't run anymore.

I had to have run for miles before I finally decide to stop and breathe. I walk down the dark streets of Tokyo, trying to catch my breath, when I catch a glimpse of myself in the reflection of a store window. With the blood streaked down my face, and with my obvious lack of clothing, nobody could possibly tell who I am. I look like a beaten prostitute, and for this reason, nobody on the streets seem to care about my condition. As I continue walking, every person I pass gives me a disgusted look and moves to the other side of the sidewalk. For the first time in three years, nobody knows who I am.

My mind wanders as I walk. _'InuYasha, I did it. I fought back and I lived. InuYasha...InuYasha…'_

His name repeats over and over in my mind. "InuYasha…" I whimper out loud, tears stinging at the corners of my eyes. It's been three years since I last saw him. Three years since the well sucked him back into his time and sealed up forever. After that, living became a struggle. Seeing the well every single day, trying to get through, and wondering what I could have done differently to prevent this from happening. Spending my nights crying myself to sleep, and having terrible night terrors. I didn't go to school, I couldn't eat, and soon enough, I left home. That's when Katashi found me, singing in a late night bar trying to make ends meet. He promised to make me happy, and I tried to move on with my life. I vowed never to return to the well again.

But as I walk the streets of Tokyo, I know that's where my legs are taking me.

My mind is heavy from the heroin, and my left arm is numb. I grasp it, noticing that I still have the top of my arm tied off, but I'm too tired to release it. My body is slowly giving way to the heroin and continues to grow heavy and sleepy. I'm walking much slower now, but I push myself to keep going. Everything around me is all too familiar, and I know I'm so close.

Finally, I see it. The Higurashi Shrine stands in front of me, still the same as it stood three years ago. A flood of memories return to my mind, of Mom and Sota and Grandpa. For fifteen years I grew up here, surrounded by these people who loved me, and in just a matter of weeks I gave it all up. Tears threatened my eyes again. I couldn't face them. Not like this.

My legs carry me to the well house. I stand in the doorway and gaze inside, and there it is. The Bone Eater's Well. The well that once carried me 500 years into the past. Cautiously, I descend down the stairs and approach the well. I clutch my zipper case to my chest with one hand, and place the other gently on the splintery edge of the well. My breath catches in my throat at its touch and the memories of InuYasha burden my mind. Tears begin to spill down my cheeks and a loud sob erupts from my throat.

"I'm sorry...I'm so sorry, InuYasha! What did I do wrong? Why did I have to lose you?" My fist pounds against the rotten wood of the well.

A drop of blood drips down off of my head and onto the side of the well. I sigh. "Look at me. Look at what I've become. A world without you, InuYasha. This is what it has done to me."

The tears come stronger now, mixed with blood and streaking down my face. "InuYasha, I...I just can't find the will to live without you. I _need_ you."

I shut my eyes tightly, just hoping and praying for a miracle. My fingers clutch the edge of the well so tightly that my knuckles begin to turn white. My body begins to slump and I can feel myself giving in to sleep, when a cool breeze washes against the front of my face. I catch my breath and look down into the well.

The sky, full of bright twinkling stars, is staring back at me. I can smell the all-too-familiar scent of the fresh air and feel the cool breeze against my face. "It can't be...the well…" I whisper to myself in disbelief.

But in an instant, my body takes over. My legs lunge themselves over the edge and my body hurls down towards the bottom of the well. I clutch my zipper case to my chest for dear life and my mind prepares for the hard impact of the ground. But instead, my body is engulfed in a radiant blue light.

In less than a moment, I'm standing at the bottom of the well, staring up at the sky.

"InuYasha...I _need_ you."


	4. Saved

My fingers grasp the vines that drape the insides of the well, and I attempt to pull myself up, but I just can't find the strength. The palms of my hands are blanketed with tiny gashes from the broken pieces of mirror. Pulling on the vines causes them to open and bleed. Thank God for the heroin surfing through my bloodstream, dizzying my brain and dulling the pain.

Defeated, I lean my back against one of the sides of the well, sliding down into a sitting position with my knees up. I hug my zipper case to my chest. "InuYasha will find me. He'll smell my blood, and he'll come looking for me. InuYasha will save me, like he always did." I nod my head and try to reassure myself that my hanyou will come for me.

The sudden and striking fear of the possibility of InuYasha's death suddenly enters my mind and I immediately panic. My heart rate increases and I'm finding it harder to breathe. What if, in the past three years, something tragic happened that took the life of InuYasha? But then an even stronger fear creeps into my brain. What if InuYasha finally decided to follow Kikyou into the depths of Hell?

I turn to the side and vomit. Mostly from the pain my body has endured, and the drugs intoxicating my brain, but also because these two thoughts make me physically sick to my stomach. I lean my head against the side of the well and shake the thoughts from my mind.

"InuYasha…" I whisper, looking up into the night sky above me. The stars are glistening, and there is a light breeze. I can feel the light emanating from the moon against my face. This calms me, and I sigh. Sleep is very quickly beginning to overwhelm my body. My eyelids are heavy, and no matter how hard I try, I can't force them to stay open any longer. They close slowly, and immediately I feel my mind and body drifting off. My head falls limp against my knees as I succumb to sleep, but my hands still clench tightly to the zipper case pulled against my chest.

And just as my mind drifts away into glorious slumber, I swear I can hear the faint voice of somebody calling out my name.

* * *

I am awakened by the intense sensation of pain.

My mind wakes up first. The numbing intoxication of the drugs is beginning to wear off, and the pain in my body sends electrifying signals into my brain. I can feel the splintering cuts in the palms of my hands burning, the intense aching of my muscles from the wails of the belt, and the throbbing of the gash on my forehead. All of my senses are coming to. My tongue tastes the metallicy blood that coats the surface of my teeth. I smell the familiar fresh air scent of InuYasha's time mixed with the sickening scent of my own blood. I feel that my body is lying down on a hard wooden surface, my arms by my sides. My face basks in the warmth of what feels like a nearby fire. I can hear its crackling, but what catches my attention the most is the sound of quiet sobbing.

Opening my eyes is a struggle. Slowly, I turn my head, opening my bloodshot eyes. For a moment, everything is a blur. I see the bright yellows and oranges of a blazing fire, and my eyes catch what looks to be like the black blob of my zipper case. Beside me is a figure, clothed in red. I blink a few times to focus my eyes, and look again at the figure close to me.

InuYasha sits beside me, his head in his hands, and his body noticeably trembling. Tears sting the corners of my eyes, and I forget all about the pain. All I want to do is wrap my arms around him and never let go. I try to raise a hand to his face, but my body refuses to move. Next, I try to speak.

"Inu…" I breathe, just barely audible. But it's enough for his acute hearing to pick up.

InuYasha's hands drop from his face and he looks down at me, his eyes pleading. Tears have stained his cheeks. I can see now that the tips of his beautiful white hair are stained a dark red, and I immediately know it's my own blood. As he looks at me, the pain in my body disappears, and I curve my lips into a weak smile.

"Kagome…" InuYasha whispers. "Kagome, I'm so sorry…"

A clawed hand gently cups my cheek, and with all the strength I can muster, I reach up and place my hand over his. My entire body relaxes in relief. This is real. InuYasha is here.

"Inu...Yasha...p-please…" I manage to produce.

"Shh, Kagome. You need to rest." His hand moves to the top of my head, stroking my hair gently. But I need more.

"H-hold me…" I finally get those words out.

InuYasha's eyes soften. "Kagome...please rest."

"Please...InuYasha. Hold me...please…"

InuYasha sighs and carefully slides his hands underneath my head and my legs. With gentle ease, he lifts me into his lap. I wince in pain, a sharp breath leaving my lips, and InuYasha hesitates for a moment before cradling me comfortably in his arms. I lay my head in the crook of his neck and notice that he isn't wearing the robe of the Fire-Rat anymore. The next moment, he drapes the robe around me, and his warmth fills my body.

I sigh heavily into his neck and he shivers, turning to nuzzle his face against mine. His cheeks are moist from the tears. I can feel my own tears trickling down my face, burning my cheeks. InuYasha smells the bitter saltiness of them, and reaches up to brush them away with the pad of his thumb.

For a long time, we sit like this. Silent, taking in each other's warmth and breathing in each other's scent. Ignoring my pain, relishing each other's presence after three long years. After what seems like hours, InuYasha speaks.

"How much pain are you in?" He whispers low in his throat.

"I'm okay right now." I reply, which is the truth. Being in InuYasha's arms subdues my pain.

"Kagome...what happened to you?" His voice catches in his throat, an indication that he was trying not to cry.

But I can't respond. A lump forms in my throat and my stomach drops. Suddenly, all of the pain returns in full force. My muscles ache tremendously, my head begins to throb, and my body stings in agony. I feel like I could puke.

"You smell like…" InuYasha hesitates and his face falls into a solemn expression.. "I can smell the scent of a man on you, Kagome."

Immediately, I burst into tears, pulling InuYasha's robe up to my face. InuYasha knew. Even through all the blood, InuYasha can smell the stench of sex radiating from my body. The smell of Katashi's fluids inside of me. All that time he sat here, holding me close to him, he could smell it and he knew. I sob in regret. InuYasha pulls me closer, hugging me to his chest.

"I'm so sorry, InuYasha…" I shake my head against his chest. "It meant nothing...I don't love him…" InuYasha hushes me and rocks me back and forth slowly, calming me down.

"Did he do this to you, Kagome?"

A loud sob bubbles up and erupts from my throat. InuYasha's body tenses. It was all he needed to know the answer. His arms tighten around me, but he's careful not to hurt me. I can feel small hot droplets hit my face, and I know he's crying again. I look up at him. InuYasha's eyes are closed tight, and his face is contorted into a grimace. His body is trembling and tears are flowing freely down his cheeks.

"I should have been there for you. I never should have let you go, Kagome. I'm so sorry...I'm so sorry I wasn't there to save you!" InuYasha sobs.

"InuYasha…" I choke and press my face into his neck.

"I promise I'll never let anybody hurt you again, Kagome. I swear on my life, I will keep you safe."

"I let this happen." I whisper against the bare skin on his collar. "It's my fault."

InuYasha pull back abruptly and looks me dead in the eyes. "Don't you dare say that!"

I drop my eyes from his gaze and stare into my lap. It's then that I finally notice the fresh bandages wrapped expertly around the palms of my hands and bare stomach.

"But it is…" The memory of my last moments with Katashi immediately floods my mind.

* * *

" _You stupid bitch!" He flounces over to me and grabs my zipper case, throwing it hard against the front door. "How many times have I told you to quit that shit?"_

" _I warned you what would happen if I caught you doing this again."_

" _You stupid, stupid, stupid bitch!" Each word accented with a lash to my stomach._

* * *

"If only I weren't so stupid…" I mumble under my breath.

InuYasha carefully lifts me out of his lap and places me on the floor in front of him. He stands and without saying a word, wanders outside. I notice now that we're in a small one room wooden house, with a warm fire in the center of the room. My eyes stare into the center of the fire, drying the tears on my face. Beside the fire sits my black zipper case. Immediately, my body yearns for the contents within. To feel that sweet, sweet drug coursing through my veins, invading my brain and my body with intoxicating pleasure, making all the pain go away.

I mentally slap myself and bring my mind back to focus. Carefully, I stand. My legs are weak and I stumble, but I force my legs to carry myself to the door. I slide the wooden door to the side and step outside. The cool air feels nice against my beaten body and I breathe in its fresh scent. Looking around, I search for InuYasha.

I finally spot him up in a nearby tree, sitting on his hands and feet on one of its lower branches. He is blankly staring out into the open sky. My eyes catch a glimpse at the tree's trunk, and I notice that it has obvious claw marks, and chunks of it are missing. My heart sinks. _'InuYasha…'_

I approach the tree and lean against its trunk, sliding down into a sitting position. Everything is quiet except for the faint sound of crickets chirping. InuYasha's voice startles me.

"You're aren't stupid."

I look up at InuYasha, but he is still staring into the sky.

"I'm sorry for all the times I called you that, Kagome. You're aren't stupid." Guilt blankets InuYasha's voice.

"InuYasha, please…" I don't want him to feel this way.

InuYasha leaps from the tree and gracefully lands in front of me. I see now that his eyes are glassy and pain is written all over his face. "It's not your fault, Kagome! You aren't stupid!" He sobs loudly.

I lunge at him and wrap my arms around his neck. He catches me in his arms, wrapping them tight around my midsection and pressing his nose into my hair. "Please don't cry, InuYasha." I whisper into one of his pointed doggy ears.

InuYasha picks me up, and my legs wrap around his waist. He carries me back into the house and sits down by the fire, swiftly changing my position so that he is cradling me again in his arms. Softly, he rocks me back and forth, and kisses my forehead gently.

"Sleep now, Kagome." He whispers.

With a weak smile on my face, I snuggle into InuYasha's chest and let sleep take over my body.

' _Thank you, InuYasha. Thank you for saving me.'_


End file.
